There is nothing better than the feeling of being accomplished, no matter how small the project was. How often do you beat yourselves for not finishing your projects on time and then feeling that you are not enough? You strive to be the best in everything, the best daughter, the best friend, the best wife, the best partner, the best mother, the best caregiver, yet very often completely disregard the need for you to rest, breathe, and simply smell the roses. There is a reason why you might feel overwhelmed. Instead of planning, taking one step at a time, and resting in between, you might be just starting many at the same time and not taking any rest in between.
I noticed that women are especially vulnerable to falling into this trap of not being enough because women are known for believing that multitasking is normal and all tasks can be done equally well. Although this might be true for some, the majority of us need to concentrate on one project at a time. Also prioritizing is the key.
How to Prioritize?
In a world where everything is important and should be done yesterday, some distance to each project might be necessary. This might sound counterproductive, yet the best thing is actually writing down all the tasks you agreed to. If you feel that writing it down wastes your time and you could complete something else instead, you are not taking into consideration the bigger issue. By writing it down not only you can keep track of the projects, you can also allocate the time necessary to complete each. You might be surprised that to your original estimate, you need to add 50%, for example, if you estimate that something will take you 2 hrs., in reality, will take you 3 hours.
Once you write down all the tasks and projects you can easily identify which one is more urgent, and which one you can push to the end of the line. It is very important to write them all down and add some as they come along.
I noticed that women are especially vulnerable to falling into this trap of not being enough because women are known for believing that multitasking is normal and all tasks can be done equally well.
Best Ways to Write it Down
- If you have the room on the wall, get an erasable board, it is good a good option as you can easily change projects around, and add new or simply scratch off.
- A physical calendar is better than the one on the phone because you can easily track each project.
- My favorite is keeping posted notes, either on that erasable board, inside of the kitchen cabinets doors, or on the pantry’s door. The reason I love this the best is because I can make a column for immediate projects, a column for this week’s projects, and a column for this month’s projects.
Start Completing Projects One at a Time
Staying focused on one task at a time will truly simplify your life. While sometimes you can do 2 or 3 grouping them together, it is just more productive to stay on one, not to mention not getting the anxiety of working on too many things at once. You might find that you will finish much quicker by concentrating on one at a time.
In the past, I would overcommit, and then group some projects together. Did I finish? Not always, and that’s when I didn’t feel good, and the overwhelming feeling was not fun and not worth it.
Once I started writing down each project and the estimated time to do it, I realized that there is not enough time in a day to do all of that, so I started declining some. That freed my time and concentrating at one project at a time gave me the feeling of great accomplishment as everything I planned was actually done with less stress, even if other projects were pushed back. I no longer felt guilty about not committing to some projects and not completing enough. Why do we put so much expectation and why there is a need to complete everything at once?
Take Time for Yourself to Rejuvenate
This is easier said than done, especially when taking care of family. Often, we feel guilty when taking time off. There is always someone who needs your attention. Yet, without the rest, you are not capable of caring for others. You need to recharge your batteries, otherwise, you might find yourself moody, easily irritated, angry, exhausted or all of the above.
You don’t necessarily need a trip away from home to get you rejuvenated. It could be as simple as having your morning coffee or tea before anyone else wakes up. Simply find a place you enjoy, sit down in your favorite room or better yet outside, if you can walk barefoot for a few minutes, grounding yourself before starting your day. Listen to some music you enjoy, watch the birds, listen to their chirping, meditate or pray, and breathe in and out, paying attention to how the breath affects each organ.
It might take time to practice, yet you will find this calming and satisfying.
Taking time for yourself might be the most powerful thing in your day, every day. That’s how I get my energy for all the tasks and projects ahead of me.
Let me know if you are writing down everything that is on your plate (including taking the time to yourself) and if that makes you feel calmer and more accomplished.